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Thanksgiving for a Habitat. The Common Life. (for Chester Kallman)




Thanksgiving for a Habitat

 

 

Nobody I know would like to be buried

with a silver cocktail-shaker,

a transistor radio and a strangled

daily help, or keep his word because

 

of a great-great-grandmother who got laid

by a sacred beast. Only a press lord

could have built San Simeon: no unearned income

can buy us back the gait and gestures

 

to manage a baroque staircase, or the art

of believing footmen don't hear

human speech. (In adulterine castles

our half-strong might hang their jackets

 

while mending their lethal bicycle-chains:

luckily, there are not enough

crags to go round. ) Still, Hetty Pegler's Tump

is worth a visit, so is Sch& #246; nbrunn,

 

to look at someone's idea of the body

that should have been his, as the flesh

Mum formulated shouldn't: that whatever

he does or feels in the mood for,

 

stock-taking, horse-play, worship, making love,

he stays the same shape, disgraces

a Royal I. To be over-admired is not

good enough: although a fine figure

 

is rare in either sex, others like it

have existed before. One may

be a Proustian snob or a sound Jacksonian

democrat, but which of us wants

 

to be touched inadvertently, even

by his beloved? We know all about graphs

and Darwin, enormous rooms no longer

superhumanise, but earnest

 

city-planners are mistaken: a pen

for a rational animal

is no fitting habitat for Adam's

sovereign clone. I, a transplant

 

from overseas, at last am dominant

over three acres and a blooming

conurbation of country lives, few of whom

I shall ever meet, and with fewer

 

converse. Linnaeus recoiled from the Amphibia

as a naked gruesome rabble,

Arachnids give me the shudders, but fools

who deface their emblem of guilt

 

are germane to Hitler: the race of spiders

shall be allowed their webs. I should like

to be to my water-brethren as a spell

of fine weather: Many are stupid,

 

and some, maybe, are heartless, but who is not

vulnerable, easy to scare,

and jealous of his privacy? (I am glad

the blackbird, for instance, cannot

 

tell if I'm talking English, German or

just typewriting: that what he utters

I may enjoy as an alien rigmarole. ) I ought

to outlast the limber dragonflies

 

as the muscle-bound firs are certainly

going to outlast me: I shall not end

down any oesophagus, though I may succumb

to a filter-passing predator,

 

shall, anyhow, stop eating, surrender my smidge

of nitrogen to the World Fund

with a drawn-out Oh (unless at the nod

of some jittery commander

 

I be translated in a nano-second

to a c. c. of poisonous nothing

in a giga-death). Should conventional

blunderbuss war and its routiers

 

invest my bailiwick, I shall of course

assume the submissive posture:

but men are not wolves and it probably

won't help. Territory, status,

 

and love, sing all the birds, are what matter:

what I dared not hope or fight for

is, in my fifties, mine, a toft-and-croft

where I needn't, ever, be at home to

 

those I am not at home with, not a cradle,

a magic Eden without clocks,

and not a windowless grave, but a place

I may go both in and out of.

 

 

 

 

The Common Life

 

 

(for Chester Kallman)

 

A living-room, the catholic area you

(Thou, rather) and I may enter

without knocking, leave without a bow, confronts

each visitor with a style,

 

a secular faith: he compares its dogmas

with his, and decides whether

he would like to see more of us. (Spotless rooms

where nothing's left lying about

 

chill me, so do cups used for ash-trays or smeared

with lip-stick: the homes I warm to,

though seldom wealthy, always convey a feeling

of bills being promptly settled

 

with cheques that don't bounce. ) There's no We at an instant,

only Thou and I, two regions

of protestant being which nowhere overlap:

a room is too small, therefore,

 

if its occupants cannot forget at will

that they are not alone, too big

if it gives them any excuse in a quarrel

for raising their voices. What,

 

quizzing ours, would Sherlock Holmes infer? Plainly,

ours is a sitting culture

in a generation which prefers comfort

(or is forced to prefer it)

 

to command, would rather incline its buttocks

on a well-upholstered chair

than the burly back of a slave: a quick glance

at book-titles would tell him

 

that we belong to the clerisy and spend much

on our food. But could he read

what our prayers and jokes are about, what creatures

frighten us most, or what names

 

head our roll-call of persons we would least like

to go to bed with? What draws

singular lives together in the first place,

loneliness, lust, ambition,

 

or mere convenience, is obvious, why they drop

or murder one another

clear enough: how they create, though, a common world

between them, like Bombelli's

 

impossible yet useful numbers, no one

has yet explained. Still, they do

manage to forgive impossible behavior,

to endure by some miracle

 

conversational tics and larval habits

without wincing (were you to die,

I should miss yours). It's a wonder that neither

has been butchered by accident,

 

or, as lots have, silently vanished into

History's criminal noise

unmourned for, but that, after twenty-four years,

we should sit here in Austria

 

as cater-cousins, under the glassy look

of a Naples Bambino,

the portrayed regards of Strauss and Stravinsky,

doing British cross-word puzzles,

 

is very odd indeed. I'm glad the builder gave

our common-room small windows

through which no observed outsider can observe us:

every home should be a fortress,

 

equipped with all the very latest engines

for keeping Nature at bay,

versed in all ancient magic, the arts of quelling

the Dark Lord and his hungry

 

animivorous chimaeras. (Any brute

can buy a machine in a shop,

but the sacred spells are secret to the kind,

and if power is what we wish

 

they won't work. ) The ogre will come in any case:

so Joyce has warned us. Howbeit,

fasting or feasting, we both know this: without

the Spirit we die, but life

 

without the Letter is in the worst of taste,

and always, though truth and love

can never really differ, when they seem to,

the subaltern should be truth.

 

 

 

 

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